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| September 29, 2005 "Melissa Etheridge's Fight for Her Life" Quick, name two Melissa Etheridge songs. This episode should be called "Melissa Etheridge's Failed Battle for Commercial Success." |
| September 28, 2005 "Ashley Smith" This is not the Ashley Smith you knew in middle school. This is the woman that was held captive by the guy in Atlanta that shot the people in court and escaped. How did she convince the guy to turn himself in? She gave him crystal meth. God told her to. I don't know about you, but I think she's WEIRD. |
| September 27, 2005 "Brooke Shields" Remember Brooke Shields? She used to be married to Agassi and she used to have a sitcom. She was on Oprah today talking about her post-partum depression. Having a child is a JOYFUL experience! What's her problem? She's not aging all that well. That probably has a lot to do with it. Leave the baby out of it and get over yourself. Everyone gets old. Even Oprah! (barely) |
| October 20, 2004 "Oprah Goes to Paris" I don't want you to think that I've gotten lazy by not keeping up with Oprah. I've been working crazy hours and just can't get home in time to see that delightful face. I'm doing the best I can. In the meantime, check out www.oprah.com! Oprah's got her own website! It's really neat. |
| October 14, 2004 "A Special Experiment: Men Turn Into Women" I am pleased to announce that I did not see this episode. |
| October 12, 2004 "Tatum O'Neal's Hollywood Nightmare" I hate to sound like a broken record, but I missed this one too. I like Tatum O'Neal because I like The Bad News Bears, but I also like John McEnroe and I have a feeling she was totally blasting on him and who wants to hear that? Not me. Probably Oprah. I bet she doesn't like John McEnroe. If Oprah had been John McEnroe, there wouldn't have been as much yelling. Oprah's got attitude, but she doesn't yell. It's like playful attitude. Endearing attitude. |
| October 11, 2004 "World's Biggest Baby Shower!" I was unable to make it home in time for this, which is okay because it sounds incredibly lame. Oh, wait, hold on... "Plus, celeb moms Cindy Crawford, Heather Locklear, Denise Richards and more! And, breaking baby news." Breaking baby news I could probably do without, but I could have used the others in my life. Incidentally, I think it's funny that Oprah used an exclamation point for the celebrities but not for breaking baby news. |
| October 8, 2004 "Richard Gere, Jennifer Lopez & Susan Sarandon" Obviously this was a terrible show to miss, and I hate to say that I didn't see it. J. Lo, SS, and Oprah. Wowzers. |
| October 7, 2004 "Can This Suburban Mom Stop Drinking?" Beats me. Didn't see it. I hope she can. If anyone has a follow-up on this, please let me know and I will post it here. |
| October 6, 2004 "Around the World with Oprah" Didn't see it. I seriously doubt she really went around the world. I know she's got the money to do it, but I bet she didn't. |
| October 5, 2004 "Oprah Investigates: Emotionally Tortured Wives." I turned this on and it was about this guy who was really mean to his wife. He was a jerk. Then I played some Battlefront for a while. First I was the Empire and I finished my Galactic Conquest mission and then I tried my hand at being the Rebels and got my butt KICKED. Then I turned back on Oprah and the guy was apologizing to his wife and no one believed him. The girl was very pretty and could do much better than the shlubby Eddie. One out of three women is in an emotionally abusive relationship. That ain't cool. |
| October 4, 2004 I have no idea what this episode was about. I turned it on at 4:30 and there were siamese twins joined at the head on an operating table and Oprah said "about to undergo surgery" and I said "GROSS no thank you" and turned it off right away. |
| October 1, 2004 "I Shot My Molester." I didn't really watch much of this. It seemed very much like a Sally Jesse Raphael episode. I think Oprah is better than that. |
| September 30, 2004 "The Millionaire Women Next Door." I didn't see much of this. Some lady started a line of clothes for pregnant women and it's now a 500 million dollar empire. Big stupid deal. |
| September 29, 2004 "Oprah's Voting Party." Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Christina Aguieileieileria were on to tell people to vote. The results are in-- they looked GREAT. I wonder where Lucy Liu was. I can't really respect Drew and Cameron without Lucy. P. Diddy was on too, but I turned it off before he came on. |
| September 28, 2004 "This Show Could Save Your Life." Leeza Gibbons was on talking about what to do when your brakes don't work and stuff. She looked GREAT. I'm not gonna lie-- Oprah looked pretty good, too. Man, you wouldn't believe how good Leeza looked. Also, if your body is impaled by an object (such as a microphone stand), DO NOT move or remove the object. Removing the object can cause more damage to the organs and could cause you to bleed to death. Consider your life SAVED. |
| September 27, 2004 Today's show had Amy Fisher on it, I guess to tell her side of the story. I didn't see it. I had to go to the chiropractor after work. |